I have had the unique experience of going on one date through an on-line service and meeting a really great guy. We have been together for 9 months and have a great friendship and passionate relationship. He lived in NYC and I am on Long Island. As a single mom, I almost always went in to his apt. which was great; it was like my ‘other’ life and I loved it.
In June he graduated college (a returning student – we’re both in our 40’s) and moved to New Mexico for a graduate program. At first he was just going to attend summer sessions; so I thought 12 weeks comes and goes quickly, no problem. But now, he has the wonderful opportunity to stay and complete his program next September. I think it is great and I am truly happy for him.
While I am crazy about him, we will have been apart for a longer period of time than we have been together. Can such a new relationship withstand so much distance for so long? We agreed to no commitments. After all we are on opposite sides of the country and grown adults with needs and desires, so whatever happens, happens. And honestly, my desires are beginning to get the best of me, so what’s a girl to do?
I don’t really want to start dating, because I do love this guy. But he has not and cannot commit to anything. He does not know where he will get a job or work after he is done with school and I appreciate that it is a unique and liberating position for him to be in. He is asking nothing of me either. I don’t know if I want to wait around for an entire year when there are no guarantees that we will be together when he returns…if he returns.
Maybe dating would be good. Give me a chance to compare, see who else/what else is out there. I got divorced, took a 2 year hiatus from men and then met my current man. Perhaps taste-testing the dating world would be good, for both of us. After all, I suppose if we were meant to be together, we ultimately will be.
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